Let's Dance to HIS tune.

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Thursday, November 29, 2012


SO,  I am not moving in the sense of moving out of my house.

I am  moving blogs.


I'm glad you asked.

Because I really DO NOT want to move, but this particular blog won't let me post pictures any more.  Oh wait, they will but I have to pay a monthly fee.

Um. no.

So...if for some reason you are readig this blog, and would like to continue, go HERE.

Of course, it could be that I am talking to that one person out there who still stops by here.  Still...

See you on the flip side.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Today is election day.  And quite frankly, I am tired of the commercials.  The crazy part is...we don't even watch tv.  :P

I won't try to change your mind.  I can only trust it is not an emotional decision;  or a stubborn prideful one.

Just, truly... who is the best man for the job.

Nope, I'm not going to talk about the elections today.

Instead, today I really want to talk about marriage.

I heard through the grapevine that Lisa Whelchel got a divorce.


I find that insulting and aggravating.

And quite frankly, she needs to get out of the spot light and let someone else pick up the mantle of grace, faithfulness, holiness.

It wasn't like he was beating her,  cheating on her, threatening to kill her.  Or even stopped loving her.

I guess after  24 years of marriage, and the life she spoke about in HIM was a joke...it as time to move on, be free.

Someone needed to go over to her house and slap her.

See.. as a Christian, your life...well it is totally NOT about you.  It is about HIM.

Do you not think there haven't been decades in my life when divorce didn't just look good, but seemed like the only solution??!!?
Do you think marriage is easy? fun? romantic? a perfect partnership? running through the woods hand in hand?

OK fine there are moments like that.

But there are also moments when you realized just how selfish you are, and I am not going to lie,  your spouse is the best person to blame for all your problems.

Marriage is not about what you can get out of it. It is not about feelings.  It is not about not dying alone.  It is not about doing the next thing in the time frame of life.  It certainly is not about getting our needs met.

It is about love.

Though the looking-lovingly-into-each-other's-eyes, not-being able-to-feel-complete-until-we-are-together-again, I-can-conquer-the-world-as-long-as-you-are-by-my-side, etc. kind of love is what usually gets you to the altar...

It is the knock out, dragged out, tired, painful, exasperated, angry, cry your eyes out,  quiet, loud, hurt, feeling hopeless but still holding on, trusting it will eventually become better though you seriously can't imagine it, clinging to The Cross because Jesus is all you have, and  you realize HE is all you need kind of love that will pull you through.

Marriage is a commitment.  No vacations, no get out of jail free cards, no do overs, no oopsies.

It is for life.  It is until death.

I have heard "  We made a mistake. We were young and didn't know each other very well. We just grew part.  S/he is a butt. We were not Christians when we got married.  I didn't know what I was doing.  S/he wasn't The One.'       You say the excuse, I have heard it.  Sometimes in my own head.

All I can say is..there is a problem?  Well doggone it, grab your cross, get your big boy/big girl panties on and deal with it, work it out and fix it.

Mind you, I was 17 years old when I got married. Still in high school.  To a guy I 'knew' for 5 months. Neither one of us were Christians.  Nothing in common. Different cultures. Different visions.


Almost 28 years ago, I made a vow.

And that vow has had its moments when it about killed me with sorrow/anger.

I bet this time next week, I will again think divorce is the answer to all my problems.  Again.

I am no saint.

But you now what?


And THAT is all that matters.

THAT will pull me through.

THAT will help me love my husband to distraction, when I would rather despise him.

THAT will give me the hope, that pin hole of light I need to take the next step in those moment when I don't want to or have the strength.

Because at the end of the day, how I lived it out for HIM is all that will matter.  Marriage was HIS idea.

And boy does HE hate divorce.

So, Lisa Whelchel, and all those 'christians' in the spot light who thought divorce was an option, please stop talking.  Please go figure out your life, your faith, your future in HIM.

Again, I am not talking the situations were violence, genuine fear for your life or pure evil exists in the marriage.  That is a totally different situation.

And please don't think my marriage is the pits.  Yes, it has pits moments. More than I care to admit or think about.  But we also have wonderful glorious, peaceful, supportive, fun, full of joy and laughter, discovery and awe moments.

It is called marriage.

GOD is good.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

I am appalled at my ignorance.

Anyway, the education continues.

Moving on... elections are right around the corner!!  Both candidates leave so much to be desired.  But I now in it all, GOD is still supreme.  so if by chance our present president gets re-elected and I feel like panicking and throwing up, I will remember this truth, and move on.

We have 3 birthdays in 4 days this month!!  Because to spread the out would not be as much fun.  lol.  My son and my son in law are 2 days apart.  Seriously...his mom &I were pregnant at the self same time!!! Weird, in  cool kind of way.  And now my future daughter in law's birthday is the day before my son!!!

So, after 5 months, this vegan this is still not cool.  At least now I know what I am doing, and I can feed the man.

But seriously, it doesn't stop it from being the pits.   :P

And going out to eat..not so much fun.  We basically have 2  or 3 places to pick from, and THAT is also the pits, living here in Jersey where we have access to authentic food from EVERYWHERE!!!


OK, I will stop complaining.

The girls are now real sisters.  Getting into fights and giving each other the stare down; and then 2 minutes later skipping/laughing/playing together like best friends.

GOD is good.

And beautiful boy?  Amazingly enough, he gets more beautiful everyday. Seems impossible, but it s true!

Ok, off to make vegan cookies.  Which HEY, everyone seems to like.  Most don't even realize they are vegan.  lol.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

I keep forgetting.

Tonight, Samuel took a science test.  It came with the curriculum.  Truly, it is the first time he took one of these tests.  Usually he takes a math test, which is work it out; or an essay tests.  Or tests that I make up because the test from the book was too easy.

But tonight, I let him take the  test that came with the curiculum.

He looked at it and asked, " Wait, how do you do this?"

He has never seen a 'match it' test.  When I explained it to him, he burst out laughing.  He couldn't believe it!  He was so happy.  He was almost giddy and ran to take it  before I changed my mind and made up a new test.

I don't have the heart to tell him just how many kids take these test all the time.

I will let him enjoy this moment.

And guess what?  We got to see Live with Kelly & Michael!!

I want to go again.  It as super cool and great fun.  We need to take April with us next time.

And speaking of April, she had her bridal shower this past Saturday.  It was lovely.  Seriously, it was in her backyard, and her backyard is dreamy.  Her momma is  talented gardener, and I WISH I had 1/10 of her talent or patience.

She is beautiful, my future daughter-in-law.  Don't you think?  Not only is she this pretty, but she has a heart of gold, and she loves my son.

Which makes her perfect.

The bridal party.  

Yes, that is my daughter, the only brunette.  lol

<3 p="p">

OK, I need to go back to the game.  
Giants are winning.  life is good.

And GOD is great.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Horrible. Horrible.  horrible.

The embassy attacks are just awful.

I was listening to talk radio.

( Have I mentiond I love talk radio?  I have?  Many times?  sorry.)

I find it irritatingly pathetic how most of the media has Romney's opinion on what he would have done and how he would have failed.

Um. HELLO??!!??!

How come no one is asking Pres. Obama, "WHAT THE HELL HAPENED??!!??!"

Exuse my French.

Isn't he in office RIGHT NOW?

Why is he not anwering the hard questions?

Maybe I am expecting too much.

I mean, he is our president.  He is very busy.


Too busy going on David Letterman.

Too busy going to Beyonce's fundraising party to go meet with a world leader.

Life is tough.

Allow me to state, I am not a Romney fan.

I may  have to write in a name on election day.

Because right now, Mickey Mouse is looking pretty good.

I jest, of course.  I will not write MM's name in.

Moving on.

Chrisitian started Sunday  School.  I stay with her.  Bonding.  :D

Check out the picture!   <3 p="p">

My happy girl learning about Jesus.

Life is good.

The 2 of them paying attention to the Bible story.

In the end, what will matter more is that these chidren, the ones HE gave us to raise, walk in HIS way, trust in HIS will, live out HIS heart, and at the end, hear "Well done my good and faithfull servant."

Then we will have lived a good life.

<3 .="." p="p">

And now, off to the next thing.

Which is NOT a nap.  :::sigh:::

Thursday, September 6, 2012

I fell asleep

I know it has been a while since I have been here.

I am pretty ok with that.

See, sometimes I think, I will blog tonight, and then tonight came,  and I fell asleep.

I forgot how having little ones is mentally exhausting, and I am way older now.

But I love it.   :D

Elly & Christian are inseparable.

Even after  almost a month.  Yes, they have their moments, but for the most part...

And how do they love being twins??!!?

School started.  I  have an 8th grader and 1st grader and Kindergartner.  I had not planned on the K.   I thought we would have 3 year old fun.  Not so much.  But having homeschooled for a little while now, I can adjust.  Well, let me rephrase that, we will all adjust.

Our K.  She wanted their Bible to sit with her.

First grade looks so good.  And she has developed an odd attachment to the crocodile.

Made him take a picture, too.  8th grade will kill us or make us.  I am praying for the 'make'.

Our homeschool 2012-2013

Little sisters attack.

Loads of work this year.

Now if we could only we finish every. last. page. 

On another note, my future daughter in law's bridal shower is less than a week and a half away!!!!

I am getting quite excited.

She is a lovely girl, and as much as I love my first born, sometimes I think she is too good for him.  not in a mean way, but in a " Son, live a life that deserve her, always."

Anyway, I decided I am going to get a new dress for the shower.  I can't remember the last time I bought myself a new dress.  Not counting when our daughter got married.

Now if only I can find the time to go shopping.

I may have to pull out an old standby, and it will  be ok, I have lovely dresses.  But a new dress would be nice.

I can't leave without letting yous all know how much I love it that our grandson is 10 minutes away, now,  as opposed to  7 hours.  

have I mentioned...he is SO beautiful??!!??

Sunday, August 12, 2012

HE gives and HE takes away

This is a hard post.

But not.

Yesterday, we picked up our daughter.

I am trying not to cry.  Right now our girls are in their room having a tea party.  Again.  They have yet to be more than 6 inches from each other.  They crack up, they run together, play together, they stare at each other while eating and start laughing from joy.

Which kind of makes me want to cry.


At the airport, we met the other couple who was also waiting for their daughter, the same chaperon was bringing both of them.

It is their first adoption.  They asked me if the transition is easy as they have heard.

I asked them who on earth told them that??!!??!!

It is the hardest, funnest, scariest, what-was-I-thinking, greatest, I-cant-imagine-life-without-them, I must be7 kinds of crazy, I need to hug them right NOW, I am exhausted, let me kiss that face one more time, kind of  experience.

But easy???

Heck no.

Seriously, parenting is not easy.  An adjusting to a new personality, culture, routine, trying to bond and a general getting used to, and on top of that you can't even communicate??

I don' think easy is the word I would use.

Christian is trying to adjust to the adults.  Not that she is having a hard time, but adjusting to Elly was a piece of cake.

And she is terrified of the animals.  Specially the dogs.   I told John, maybe the dogs in the Congo are crazy, mean, street dogs, and she was told to run when she saw one or she would be attacked.

Well, she RUNS let me tell you.

Meanwhile, the beagles hardly move.  :P  Elly keeps trying to show her the dogs couldn't care less if you sat on them and put your hand in their mouth.  They MIGHT open an eye.  Maybe.

Another situation, she just takes off outside.  Runs to the street without thought.

Oh dear one, you are not in Africa anymore.

GOD is good.

Today is my brother-in-law's birthday.

He would have been 50.

He was a gift of GOD kind of man.  We hardly had anything in common, except Jesus.  In fact, he was the one who introduced us to HIM.

Because of Peter, our lives were able to be radically changed by the KING of KINGS,  and our focus and goals changed.

And that common factor made us close.

It has been 16 years since he passed away.  There is not a week, some times it is not a day, that I don't think of him.

He truly was the brother I did not have.

I miss him, still.

Not gonna lie, even after 16 years, there are times I still cry over him not being here.  Sometimes it is a song, a scripture, a word, a thought that reminds me.  Sometime it is looking at who my children have become, are.  My children remember him through my memories.  Even Samuel who has never met him knows him well.

My little girls will know him.  How can I not give them those memories?  How can I not introduce them to the brother of my heart, who walked me to the cross and gave me LIFE? How can they not love him, too??!!?

And if I really think about it, they, my little girls are here because of him.  Years ago, he was the one who first asked us to consider adopting from China.  Long before foreign adoptions became 'common'.

we never forgot.

Happy Birthday my dear Brother.  My desire... for HIS sake, for their own sakes, and for your sake, Peter, is to raise my children to HIS glory.  One day, my children will run into your arms in heaven, and they will thank you for who you were to HIM, to me, and in turn to them.

And they will...Because HE lives.

Peter, you had many heartaches, joys, victories, pain and sorrows, and yet this reminds me of something you told me once, and it never left me:

There were ten lepers healed, and only one turned back to give thanks, but it is to be noticed that our Lord did not recall the gift from the other nine because of their lack of gratitude. When we begin to lessen our acts of kindness and helpfulness because we think those who receive do not properly appreciate what is done for them, it is time to question our own motives.   ~ Leaves of GOD

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Just Around the river bend

School has started.

OK fine it is only math and reading; regardless, he is doing school work.

And miracle of miracles, he didn't complain!!!

I thought for sure, he as going to give the 'mom, I was in Africa for 2 months..woe to me...yadda, yadda, yadda.'

He didn't!


Samuel shocker #2.

Even though he is pretty sold on using herbs, oils and natural healing remedies, as he has successfully been the recipient of them time and time again, his eating habits left loads to be desired.  His vegan dad has gentle tried to teach an guide.

Nothing doing.

I made him watch a movie yesterday.

It is a great movie.  Sold me over more. Though I was already a believer, it pushed me over the edge.

If you would like to watch the movie for free, my favorite price, go here.

After my boy watched the movie, he went to the kitchen.

I thought for sure it was to find some left over junk-ish food we had from his welcome home party.  After all, he is 13.  Instead, as I watched is shock, he made himself a spinach, kale, broccoli, mango, carrot, cantaloupe juice, and loved it.

Maybe the brain cells are starting to work in there.

I have some news.

It is good news.

It is crazy fun and long awaited news.

It is 'I wish I could go to sleep for 2 more days straight and THEN wake up' news.

Our daughter  Christian, from the Congo is coming on Saturday!!!!


The lovely woman who is chaperoning her ( is that a real word?) home emailed me yesterday and told me she was a sweet heart; kind and joyous.  As well as...



I love it.

Poor Chloe, though now she is happy with her height or lack there of, there had been times when she was terribly upset over it.  I am pretty sure that  Elena & Christian will also deal with their...height issues, though the opposite from their big sister, until they, too, deal with it and accept it.

Some other big exciting God news to be made public...soon.

Until then, something to think about...

A man who is eating or lying with his wife or preparing to go to sleep in humility, thankfulness and temperance, is, by Christian standards, in an infinitely higher state than one who is listening to Bach or reading Plato in a state of pride.

~C.S. Lewis

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Seek Your Heart

I was reading the newspaper today.

(Yes, I still get the newspaper.  I love it.  Something about not having to sit in front of the computer and search... I like that.   Yes, I also love my Nook.  Something about having 101 books in it so far and not needing to find room for them, since I have a small house and am trying to minimize; and the fact that it fits into my pocketbook. :D  Oh, and I love the library, so I can give the book back and know it is there should I need it again for whatever reason.)

ANYWAY, in it it mentioned how a group of people are trying to 'highly encourage' (read: force) Congress to sign a student loan forgiveness bill.


Let me get this straight.

You signed a loan application, knowing full well that you had to pay back the money loaned to you, and no one as standing behind you forcing or threatening you to sign.

And now you want to be 'forgiven'?

Did you not think this through?  Did you not figure out that, regardless of the job market, by signing, it became your responsibility?

Now mind you, the debt is not 'forgiven'.  SOMEONE still has to pay the loan.  It just doesn't disappear into thin air.

It comes out of our taxes. So essentially, it should not be called a forgiveness bill, but rather a make-everyone-else-pay-even-though-they-signed-nothing-and-are-not-responsible bill.

My son has a student loan.  He pays monthly, for it is his responsibility.

We have a loan. (adoption)(business)  We pay it monthly.  There have been slim months, in the construction business.  It did not occur to us to make someone else pay for the choices we made. We have struggled in the past, and I am sure we will struggle in the future.  And we will deal with it.  Pasta for lunch and dinner, baby.  :P   We did it before, we can do it again.  I don't think we are better than these people, I am just stunned at the gimme mentality that is so prevalent in this nation.

Though I shouldn't be.

Next thought:


People are, for lack of a better word, funny.

There are now commentaries running around like what if we had Homeless Appreciation Day instead, would as many people show up?

It seems to me, that is general, people DO do show up.  Homeless Appreciation Day happens 365 days a year.

You will find Christians showing up everyday, to do their part.  You will find Christians lining up to help in any one's time of need.  Domestic and foreign. They are the most generous people.  In every single catastrophe, Christians will give money, time and effort to help.   They will take their vacation time to build homes, dig wells, feed the hungry, etc.   It has been proven that organizations like  Samaritan's Purse, World Vision, churches of all denominations, etc, have given and done more for victims than the US government, with no waste in time or money.  Proven by secular statistics, for real Christians, for the most part, don't keep score.

Do you know that on Thanksgiving and Christmas it is almost impossible to find a place to volunteer, because they fill up so quickly?  You can't even put together a food basket because they have more food than families?  That happened to me when I tried to set that up for my high school missions class project.

Do you know, there have been times that I couldn't go with my son to volunteer because they were full?

So yes, people, Christian WOULD show up for Homeless Appreciating Day.  They would wait in line to serve.  They would be turned away from lack of jobs for them, and so then they would give money, because it is the least they could do.

They would show up for just about any-need day for that matter.

What about the love part?  I have never met a Christian who refused to help a person in need, or ask first if they were homosexual, drug addicts, porn-addicted, an adulterer, an alcoholic and the such to determine if they will  help or not.  Yes, there are cult churchs who may do that, but they are cult churches, not Chrsitian churches.

Please do no confuse the two.

Anyway, I guess people will find something bad to say, after all Jesus said they would.

It is okay.

So those who went to Chik-fil-A Apprciation Day, don't worry about it.  I know you will also do your part to help ANY ONE in need.  I know because I see you there.

In amazing numbers.


Wednesday, August 1, 2012

You are not in Jersey anymore, but you are back in Jersey!

He is home.  And I am glad to see his face.

He has a few pictures.

He is a guy.  He forgets how important picture are; so did not get that from me.

Out door church service with the Sudanese.  Church service was from 9am - 1pm.  

The Team as they worked on the school's foundation.

They walked 4 miles to the nearest 'town' to celebrate Southern Sudan's VERY FIRST Independene day.

And then, we ran over to Newark to wait for him.

More to come. 

Saturday, July 14, 2012

...because HE lives...

2 weeks!!!

2 weeks and then our boy comes home!!

It has been hard, and good.  The past 5 1/2 weeks are like nothing I ever went through as a mom.  Not even my our oldest son went to boot camp.  That was hard. Not even when our oldest daughter went to TX to be an inner city camp counselor for 10 weeks.  2 summers on a row. THAT was hard.

This is a different kind of hard.

GOD continues to stretch and show me, just how much our children belong to HIM.

This summer helped me to rethink so much.  It made me rethink faith goals, schooling goals, family goals, life goals, even marriage goals.  Praying, living, crying through so many things.

Because HE lives!!!

Glory be to HIM and HIM alone.

As far as our African daughter?  Even the crickets are quiet now.

Another refining.  Another lesson in trust.  Another reason to surrender.

It has been Elena & I this summer.  Bless her heart, she is a trooper.

We have been working on house projects, gardening, watching old movies ( she LOVES I Love Lucy) seeing friends, seeing big-big brother and his future wife, her nana & poppa, looking at pictures of the grandson/nephew and agreeing over the fact that he really is a beautiful boy and of course, missing big-little brother.

The garden is doing beautifully, in spite of the fact that we have had no rain.

Thanks to the help of this little peanut who waters the garden.  It is hard work.  Watering takes 45 minutes to an hour.  I weed the plot, she waters.  When I finish, I help her, but she still works alongside me.

And she is a joy!  

She is also a little momma.

I mean, seriously.  

One day, I had bought a cantaloupe.  We got home and I unloaded that car.  I knew I bought everything in.  That night, I thought I would cut up the cantaloupe because it will get rotten if I don't.  Once it is cut up, it disappears immediately, but if not cut, it gets thrown out, which is not an option for me.

Anyway, I couldn't find it.  I went out to the car and looked for it.


Then I rethought to the afternoon, and I could have sworn I bought it in. Maybe I imagined it and actually left it at the store.


Well, 2 days later, her little stroller was in the middle of the living room.  Facing the other way. I went to put it back in the corner, and look at what I found:

Confession:  It never occurred to me to look in her stroller.

Though I should know better.

This little girl will turn anything into a baby.  If hers are not around, she will grab anything, wrap it in a blanket or towel, or stick it in her stroller or baby bed, and she is good to go. 

I mean a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g.

Toothpaste, rulers, a cup, pillows, markers, anything; randomly wrapped in a towel or mini blanket, nurtured and sang to, laided down to sleep.

Little momma, I tell you.

So, off we go.  A full week of going from here, to MA to VA Beach. 

Then coming home and waiting.

But while waiting, living for HIM.  Because HE lives!!!

Monday, July 9, 2012

You and Me, We Can Conquer the World!! Or at Least Go To The Mall.

I took Elena to the Disney Store for the first time in her life.

Our regular mall, doesn't have a Disney Store.  The thing is, even if it did, it wouldn't matter too much anyway because I can count on one hand,three fingers to be exact, give or take a finger, how many times we go to the mall in a year.  This incudes Black Friday.

ANYWAY, she is pitiful and tired of it being 'just me'.  I try to do things with her.  She is not only-child material.

SO, this Saturday, when it was 101 degrees by 9am, I decided a nice air conditioned mall was the answer to all our problems.  OK, fine, not all our problems, but at least of heat problems, as I have no central air.    Don't go there.

WELL, she responded in a way I never would have thought at this point in her American life.

She didn't move.

She stood in the entrance with her mouth haning wide open and her eyes glazed over.  I thought maybe she was going to pass out.

People walked by her as I tried to coax her in.

They giggled.

They pointed.

They stared at her staring at the store.

Once I got her in, she proceeded to touch, see, inspect every doll, shoe, pajamas, toy, cup, pencil, princess, dress, t-shirt, mug, every.glorious.thing. in the store.

We were there over an hour and a half.

I need to interupt myself and mention, this is no great store.  Just an ordinary plain ol' Disney Store at the mall.

Today, we are officially in the 'teens' on the count down for when Samuel comes home.


It has been a long hard time these past 5+ weeks.  I pray he is doing well.  I pray it changed him. I pray it made the world a bigger place for him.  I pray his compassion extends for HIS grace.  I pray he will forever understand 'your ife is not about you.'

And I pray he is having a great time.  Yes, it is probably hard.  But things can be hard and great.

SO, have I mentioned how beautiful my grandson is?  He gets more beautiful by the day.  Holy Moses, he is a cutie.

And I am TOTALLY not even being biased.   :D  Seriously!

Update on our DRC adoption:


Pathetic.  She was suppose to be home 2 weeks ago today.

And now?  Samuel may come home before she does.  YES SIREE.  8 weeks later, and nothing.

Why us?  Well, why not us, I guess.

Still I sometimes go on my email hoping and praying, pray and praying some more, that I will see good news.  Instead, it is more vegan stuff.  :P  ugh.

Update on vegaism:

I hate it.

But I cannot convince my husband any different.

Have I mentioned he is Irish?

OK, off to mail the last letter to my son.  Since it takes about 14 days to get there, this is the last day to mail anything.  This particular letter is 3 pages long.  Front & back.  I have discovered I genuinly enjoy writing letters.  Good old paper and pen.  I need to find someone to write to after this.

The Lord bless you and keep you.  Even if you reject HIM, it doesn't stop HIS grace and love for you.  <3  HE is great that way.  :)

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Time crawls when you look at the calendar

Today was the 4th of July.  ( Still is, I suppose)  Though it is about 30 seconds from becoming the 5th of July!!

The 5th of July is Daisy's birthday!!

Here is Daisy when we went pumpkin picking a few years ago.  She is the small beagle, weighing in at  22 pounds.  As opposed to Reilly, who is the big beagle weighing in at 54 pounds.  But his birthday is not until August 5.  Exactly one month later.  They are both 7 this year.

Yup, days are crawling by.  

Our boy come home in 23 days!  I wonder if time is flying by for him.  It is probably doing both.  Flying one day, crawling the next.

John's vegan-ism is going pretty ok.  I am learning and educating myself as to what to feed this man.

Mind you, I have no intent on becoming vegan myself.  My daughter showed me this book she is reading about a vegetarian. But she calles herself a flexatarian.

I like that.  That is my kind of living.  Vegetarian for the most part, chicken & fish, and thankful for what is put before you when you are a guest.


I will be a flexatarian.  :)

I went tot he library and checked out loads of vegan recipe books, and the librarian told me she has been a vegan for 4 years, so if I or he have any questions, she would be happy to answer them.  

SO, I asked her " Are you crazy??!!??!"

She did not appreciate my question.  I didn't care.  Plus she didn't even answer.


Elly-bug is done.  She misses her brother so badly.  I was hoping her little sister would be here by now, what no.  Thank you USA, once again, for...well...nothing.

We still wait and hope, sooner than later.  Though at this point it is WAY later than thought.

Elly wants to go down the shore.  I think we may rent a hotel room for a night or 2 soon.  I am not particularly fond of the beach, but it is not about me.  We will wait for Samuel to come home though. He loves the shore, too.

I should go to bed.

I need to be better at posting.

PS anyone want 3 roosters??  They are big and hearty.  Healthy and organic.

They can make a wonderful dinner.

Friday, June 22, 2012

What should we do while we wait for July 28?

So, we had this dog.  Her name was Shelby-Gurl.

She was a glorified mutt.  She was actually a Leonberger, so she is a breed specifically made for something.  Also known as a glorified mutt.

We got her when she was 5 months old from the pound.  She was abused, so training her took a l-o-n-g time.

I mean looooonnnngggg time.

But she was a sweetheart.  I used to think she was a semi useless dog, only around for the kids sake.  They loved her and she really was a good dog; but one day when Samuel was still small, one of our friends was over at the house and was wrestling with his son. He turned around and went for Samuel;  she jumped up and stood between the 2 of them, growling and her fur flying, protecting Samuel from this character.  Ok, he is a good friend.  STILL she was protecting Samuel.  Samuel, who pulled her ears & tails and sat on top of her and dragged her around. 

Last Friday, the 16th, Shelby had to be put down.  She was tired.  She was old.  She was done.  She was beautiful to the end.
And I cried.  

She was a good dog. 

Now we are a 2 beagle family.

The fact that my son is gone for weeks on end, and my dog died, I had to go.  SO, the perfect solution was...VA Beach to go see a grandson.

Elly loves going.  Granted the 7 hour one way ride leaves much to be desired, the end result totally ROCKS!!

With his grandpa!  <3  He has the most perfect chucnker legs.  And cheeks.  And toes, and a smile to melt even the coldest hearts.

John turned vegan on me.  Well, mostly vegan.


Anyway, Chloe made him a vegan cake.  Which I have to say, was not 1/2 bad!!  It was coconut.  Seriously, anything with coconut has got to taste good.  But still it tasted better than I thought it would.

On Father's Day we went out to lunch.  Josiah had this amazing looking steak...thing.

And John had vegetables.   duh.

Speaking of vegetables.  Check out the radishes from my garden.  All organic, all natural.  The size of an apple!!!  Delicious.  I love radishes.

As of today, 36 more days to go until my boys comes home.  It has been a hard time, but I wouldn't change it for the world.  I pray he is doing well, and he is learning to trust and rely on GOD and HIM alone.  Work hard, trust HIM, love hard.  I pray he changes to HIS glory.

I will try to write more often, life is too busy.  But I need to remember and record.

Next time I will tell you about my crazy fast.  Because it is crazy, and I am already regretting my decision.  But I will stick to it because I am too stubborn to quit right now.  Even though I REALLY WANT TO!!!!!

Friday, June 15, 2012

Quiet is not as cool as you think

Well, Samuel has been gone for a week.  It is so quiet around here.  I don't like it.  At all.

At first, Elena was in her glory having all the attention.  Yesterday, on the way to the bank, she asked me if she could pray that Samuel come home very very soon. I told her that he will come home when he is suppose to, but maybe she could pray that it FEELS like soon.

I need to pray that, too.

Seriously.  I miss that boy.


8 weeks is a long time.  2 weeks is doable.  1 week is nothing.

As I mentioned before, my babies will be in the same continent together, in fact in bordering countries.  But they will have to wait until they are both in the good old USA to meet.  

We had our embassy appointment on Monday and everything went well.  WOO-HOO!  Now we just wait for the visa to be issued, then apply for the exit permit which takes 3 or 4 days, and SHE IS HOME!!!   Unfortunately, visas are taking WAY too long.  As of April, they were taking 1 week.  Now minimum 3 weeks.

Of course.

I am nervous.  But not.  I have such a wonderful network of friends to support us, who have been praying, worrying, getting excited, calling, getting frustrated along side me, can't wait to meet her, love her already, love her skin, love her hair, love her name, love her, period!!  And yet, still making Elena feel like she is worth her weight in gold, kind of friends.

And our children??   They are totally sold out, too!

GOD is good to us.

My mom, sister and I went to a Lilly sale yesterday.  Afterwards, we hit an outlet mall.  While we were walking to a store, I saw this lady with a cool stroller that I may have to get.  I ran over to her, with my mom running behind me.  This woman was blonde and had 2 white-blonde haired daughters.  As we were talking,  we realized her 2 bio little girl are my adopted daughter's ages.  Almost EXACTLY!!  It was awesome.  And then, she introduced her oldest daughter who was 8.  She had the most beautiful dark skin EVER.   And her smile?  It lit up the world.

It made me glad.  She was a domestic adoption; came home with them from the hospital at 2 days old.  This couple decided to adopt from the start.  In fact, it could be said the adoption was a honeymoon baby.

I love hearts like that.

And you know what?  She didn't care that my girls are internationally adopted.  In fact, she was thrilled!

Parents of adopted children, domestically or internationally, get that.


Anyway, we are off to see a beautiful baby boy.  Oh, and my daughter and son-in-law, too.  I need me some grandson time.  The drive is a killer, but seeing that family is worth it.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Modifying Participles

I teach grammar to some high school homeschoolers.

I really enjoy grammar.

Most times, I correct people, in my head.   I have learned not to correct them in public.  People would rather be ignorant than corrected.

Unless they ask, and if they do, they usually change their minds before the day is over, not really knowing just how bad their grammar is in real life and therefore ask me to 'knock it off with the correcting, already'.

Mind you, I DO NOT have perfect grammar all the time, but I know when I am saying something incorrectly, and I cringe inside, remember the rule in my head, then move on.

Today we reviewed for the final.  I am proud of some of the students; their efforts and hard work is exemplary.  The others, they are the ones that challenge my (our) sanity.

ANYWAY, our son leaves in about 36 hours.  I am getting nervous.  I think he is, too, and it is the same kind of nervous that I have.

I will miss him.  He is thinking he will be homesick.

He will.

But GOD is good, and he will pray through it.

I am counting down the days until he comes back.  Elena and I will have two count down calendars.  One for when her little sister gets here ( again pushed out another week, so HOPEFULLY July 15) and one for when her big brother gets back home.  And we will be praying daily.

Speaking of Elly-Bug, I am taking this time when it is just the two of us, to really perfect reading.  She is right on the cust of taking off.  We are in that in-between stage, when she will sound out all the sounds of almost any word, regardless of how long or hard it is, but doesn't make it flow.

It is my goal, that when her little sister gets here, she will be able to read to her if she so desires. <3

How is eating vegetarian for the past two weeks going, you ask??   LOL  Fine you didn't ask.

It is ok.

Granted, Samuel, Elena and I are not full vegetarians, we eat organic fish & chicken sporadically, today, I took them to Burger King ( nothing in the fridge, shame on me) and they both felt gross.  I guess their body is cleaned out and it is revolting to that kind of food.  Samuel is the one who told me he felt sick, and for the first time in his life, he understood why people hate fast food.

He is the kid who always threatened to have a fast food diet when he moved out of the house.


I think he may be changing his mind.


Ok, off to church's mission classes for the kids.  Mission should be the heart beat of every believer.

After all...it is HIS heartbeat.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

I am tired.

Seriously, parenting is exhausting.

Wifing ( I made that word up) is exhausting.

Last night I watched the tail end of Fireproof.  Again.

I remember when it first came out, how people either loved it or thought it was so cheesy, it was bordering on insulting.

I liked it.  

A lot.

I certainly wasn't holywood-ish.  But that was part of its charm.

Anyway, watching it again reminded me...


As Americans, that is such a foreign concept for us.

My son reminds me all the time of his rights.  I remind him his basic rights are to serve others;

And to surrender himself for HIS glory.

Which flies in the face of what the world is telling him.

And telling me.

Glad I saw the movie again.

Last week, I took the boys ( Samuel & Co.) as well as Elena to Six Flags.


I find it hilarious how sometimes the boys want to go on the kiddie rides, so they snatch Elena from me and use her as an excuse to HAVE to go on certain rides.

As if she needs 3 chaperones.

Mind you, they also go on those rides that will take 5 years off your life in 2 minutes.

You can't get me on those for nothing.

The most adventurous ride I like is the Buccaneer boat. 

True story.

My son leaves in 6 days.  He is gone for 7 1/2 weeks.

Most people tell me we are crazy to send him.

It hurts.  But not in a bad way, just in a human way. 

At the same time, I will not be one of those people who say " Jesus said we would be persecuted."


I mean HE did say that.

But not as something to exhalt ourselves, to use for an excuse and to let everybody know that we are so holy.

Because in the end, we make choices.  We live it out as best as we can, we take the hits, the knocks and the consequences fo those decisions.

Good or bad.

And we move forward.

I am excited for him.  In a terrified way.  lol.

After all I am his mom.

I am already counting the days until he comes home.

If you are of the praying persuasion, please keep him in prayer.

And finally,



She is beautiful.  And it has nothing to do with her looks.  It is because she is our daughter.  <3

Legally, we can not post the pictures publicly.  Just friends and family.

But when she gets home!


Yous are all going to sick of all the pictures.

Excuse my Jersey.

Monday, May 21, 2012

May HE Always be on HIS Throne

We had our homeschool state fair this weekend.

One would think that since we are at the tail end of our 21 year homeschooling, I wouldn't need to hear speakers anymore.  In fact, I should try my hand at speaking.

As if.

But seriously, I went mostly to work.  I had 2 shifts and heard one speaker.   He was fantastic.  Even when I was working, my 13 year old went by himself and listened to another one of his talks. Samuel was impressed.  He was challenged.

As was I.

I purchased all his talks on cd.

Funny things was that though I saw the speakers' bios and lecture sinopsis before hand, in the flyer, he was not one that I was interested in hearing.

Go figure.

On Sunday we went to my son's future in law's for dinner.

What lovely and delightful people.  I may or may not have mentioned just how much her mom impresses me.  What grace and serenity.  And her laughter.

I could use a lesson.

Or 2.

Anyway, this weekend, my husband and I were discussing life.  Faith, nutrition, relationships, work, finances, family.   All of it ties into itself, and it got me thinking...

I KNOW all of it is lived out according to our views of who GOD is.  It is Christianity 101.

But once again, because I have a short memory, am busy, or just plain life gets in the way, no matter what...


Sometimes one aspect of our life may contradict another.  Because we are not living the world's way.  It doesn't make sense.

Such as the fact that my husband is becoming a vegetarian.  Yet, when you go to someone's home for dinner, do you live out your wants, or is the relationship more important?  Being a vegetarian does not make one more holy, just like being an omnivore doesn't either.  But being graceful and receiving that which is put before you is a holy act, one of humility and thankfulness.

My brain hurts.

Living it out for HIM is an every-breathe-you-take job.

We fail, and HE is merciful.

But at the end of the day....May HE be on the Throne of our hearts.  May we place our heads on our pillows and be thankful for our victories, as we relied on HIM, and thankful for HIS forgiveness, as we failed yet again.

Blessed be the LORD, the God of Israel, From everlasting even to everlasting. And let all the people say, “Amen."  Praise the LORD!  ~Psalm 106:48

Friday, May 18, 2012

Bufol Boy went back home. 

Woe to me.  


But the first birthday party was just...perfect.

He got a cake all to himself, he got to go to his uncle's piano recital, he got more kisses than he asked for, he was loved/held/play with/ so much, he didn't know what to make of it.

Speaking of recital, this is the most casual he ever dressed for a piano recital.  I was too busy to notice until I saw this picture.  Later that night.  :P  Had I noticed, he would be wearing an oxford shirt with a tie.

For Baby Boy's birthdat party, Elena wanted swirly hair.  A few days before, I made braids on her and at the end of the day, when we took them out, she was in love.

I told her we would do braids after her bath the night before the party.

Since her hair straightens in about an hour, I put loads of mouse before braiding, loads of hairspray right before taking them out, and this is what it looked like after HOURS into the party.

And she loved-loved-loved it.

My niece graduated college!!

She did it!

And we are all so very proud of her.

There were quite a few people graduating with her.

It took a while.

But it was glorious.

3 weeks from today, our son leaves for his mission trip.

I am having peaceful mom panic attacks.

Peaceful, because I know he is in GOD's hands. 

 Everyday of his life.  

We cannot extend it or shorten it if we tried.

And living outside of his little world and seeing GOD'S hands out of spoiled America ( mind you, I love our nation, but we ARE spoiled) will be good for him.

I remember getting lectures from people when we used to take our babies to homeless missions or feeding the hunger in the inner city continually.  I always felt like we were doing the wrong thing.   Only to find out, how else do we teach them compassion if they have no one to be compassionate to?  And how do we teach servanthood if they do not learn to serve others?  And how do we show them that GOD.SHOWS.UP. if we just lived in the comforts of our home and the entertainment of our things?  And only dwell on their own activities that revolve around them?

We can't.

So we listened to the lectures, and then we actively try to do HIS works, no matter what the good-intended people said.

BUT PLEASE do not let the fact that I talk so at peace about being at peace fool you.

In my humanity, I also panic.

It is in my nature.

And my nature is very powerful.

My mom-heart says WHAT??!!??!!  ARE YOU CRAZY??!!?

Having to stop my own lectures to myself has been a constant discipline in my faith since day 1.

My son is at peace.

He has no idea the amount of work and lack of comforts that await him.

He has to wash his own clothes.

In buckets.

And take bucket showers.

Work like a dog.

Sleep in a tent.  For 8 weeks.

Eat the basics.  Which here in America, we have no idea what that means.

And it will be good.

And HE will show up.

HE always does.  <3